Where to begin?

Amy’s questions

My husband and I are very serious about eventually enjoying the cruising lifestyle. • We are presently up against many challenges, least of those is not having any experience sailing. We live in central Ohio, therefore our opportunities to learn to sail are fairly limited.  I have done some extensive research about sailing and have decided that we just need to take a week long certification class and get that taken care of. • We are both 40 and in 5 years our children will all be out of the nest.  I have always been a “fly by the seat of my pants” kind of person, so my fear is minimal, but my husband is an organized, bit conservative fellow. Do we sell our home and all of our belongings and just jump right in, or do we keep those assets just in case? • Where do you feel the best places in the world are to sail? How do we know what is required for different countries? We have been researching the Caribbean, but I love Bali and Thailand too. Thank you very much for your time.  Any advice will be immensely appreciated, as we are feeling a bit lost and overwhelmed right now. Sincerely, Amy

Gwen Hamlin answers.

Dear Amy!  Wow!

What you are asking is what everybody wants to know, and those of us who have “been there/done that” have answers…but not necessary the formula that will be what you end up following.

That, of course, is what Women and Cruising and my column Admirals’ Angle are all about, trying to present a bunch of building blocks so you can see how others have done it and pick and choose the bits that will work for you.

Let me just say that coming from the mid-West is not the ultimate handicap.

In 1989, Shelly & Randy Tucker, from Tennessee, chartered with Gwen Hamlin on s/v WHISPER. 8 years later, they bought their own charterboat, THREE MOONS, and …they are still in the yacht charter business!. Photo: Shelly Tucker, s/v THREE MOONS

My husband got started with Hobie 16s on a reservoir in Indianapolis that was so small he could tack down it in 15-20 minutes (hence the name Tackless for his first and second monohulls  because (heh heh)..he tacked less!)

When I was in the charter business, my very first season, I had a young couple from Tennessee book my boat.  Where they got the bug from I don’t know, but we had a grand week, after which they went back, bought a small fixer-upper to sail on a local lake, sold it, stepped up to a bigger fixer-upper…and so on.

Then they bare-boated in the Virgin Islands, then they started organizing bareboat groups to the Virgin Islands, and then nearly eight years later, they actually bought their own charter boat, a huge Irwin 65, and came to the islands as I was leaving to go cruising in 1998/9.  There are still at it!  (See www.sailthreemoons.com.)

So a crewed charter, where you can fully enjoy the lifestyle but also benefit from learning one-on-one from an experienced captain (be sure to make clear to your charter broker what you hope to get out of your charter!) is a very valuable education masquerading as a vacation.  Particularly if you have curiosity about the charter business yourselves.

Women on the Water Week. Photo from the Bitter End Yacht Club website www.beyc.com

You might also want to look into  Women on the Water Week, a favorite project of Pam Wall’s, which takes place at Bitter End Yacht Club (Virgin Gorda, British Virgin Islands) in the summers.

Many women feel that having the chance to learn sailing fundamentals on their own, away from the shadow of their usually stronger, often more experienced partners makes a huge difference.  Husbands just can’t stop being protective and chivalrous and wives tend to defer in areas they aren’t knowledgeable about.

Take a course together later, maybe even someday on your own boat!  Having an instructor oversee the working systems the two of you will need to work out would have to make that whole process go more efficiently,  I had Kiwi friends who did just that on their boat before leaving New Zealand northward on their first cruise.

Do we sell our home and all of our belongings and just jump right in?

Finally, re destinations and jumping right in…go cautiously to start; hedge your bets to whatever extent your finances will allow.  Don’t sell out your house, if you live in an area it will be hard to come back to if you feel strongly about coming back there.  But your kids will be grown and may not settle where you were anyway, so often selling leaves you more flexible for future choices.  I’ve written about this process a couple of times in my Admiral’s Angle columns.

But regardless, take at least one year in a cruising ground from which you can realistically return, both to shake yourselves down and your boat.  For the East Coast that is usually the Bahamas or the Caribbean, and for the West Coast that is usually Mexico or Central America.

You know, cruising is a wonderful lifestyle, but it doesn’t turn out to be for everybody.  I’ve just been talking with a late 50s couple who’ve just returned from 18 months up the East Coast.  Perhaps it was just bad luck, but the weather seemed to be against them continuously.  Stopovers were more expensive than they anticipated, and it turned out the two of them expected different things from their destinations.  Plus they stayed in the US, which to me is a different kind of cruising than I experienced.

We have many other stories to read on WomenAndCruising.com, particularly on the “12 questions to 12 sailing Families” page.  In fact Family #12 is a family that left with two teenagers!  Perhaps you will find inspiration to go NOW!

Where do you feel the best places in the world are to sail? How do we know what is required for different countries?

For cruising info, most of us get basic info from reference books and/or (these days) websites.  Tons of that info is available on WomenandCruising.com on the page called Resources.  On that page, under Reference Books, are some links to recommended reading.  Anything by Jimmy Cornell will give you info about places, particularly his new book World Cruising Destinations.

Also, one of the first things you should do is join the The Seven Seas Cruising Association (SSCA) as an Associate Member.  This gets you their monthly Bulletin which will immerse you in the real world of cruising.  SSCA has conventions (called Gams) around the country several times a year where you will meet real cruisers and partake of good seminars.  SSCA has taken that a step further with their Seven Seas U (SSU), an online cruising university.  Excellent webinars (including ours) are available right in the comfort of your own home.

Finally, favorite places will be different depending to whom you speak.  Some people love the Caribbean, we loved Mexico and Central America (which were not even on our original plan!), others love the history and cultures of the Med.  The South Pacific and Indonesia and Thailand are also great destinations, but they are BIGGER COMMITMENTS (esp with what’s going on in the Middle East),  and, frankly, the weather is not as pleasant as the south sea tales make out!

I once had a mentor who always said, with reference to those of us living the boating life, “We have a responsibility because we are living other people’s dreams.“  What HE meant, was that we had to live the life to the biggest, fullest extent, and never cast a critical word.  But I, on the other hand, have always felt that trying to be realistic – to share some particulars of the not-so-great with the great – is the only fair way when asked for counsel on such a huge life choice.

So, hope I’ve been helpful.

Good luck,
Gwen Hamlin

Read also on this website

• Cruising Resources for Women Cruisers
• Getting Started (Admiral’s Angle column #3) – Examples of how (and when) some experienced cruisers got started show you don’t have to be a life-long sailor to take off cruising.
• Keeping a Home Back Home (Admiral’s Angle column #13) – Perspectives on the tough decision between selling all or keeping a home back home
• How We Choose Where We Cruise – Part 1 (Admiral’s Angle column #32) – Resources and strategies for planning your voyage to match your interests.
• How We Choose Where We Cruise – Part 2 (Admiral’s Angle column #33) – The role of whim, spontaneity and flexibility in voyage planning.
• How Does Chartering Fit (Admiral’s Angle column #53) – A look at how various chartering options may fit in at different stages of sailors’ cruising goals

More information (External links)

• Women on the Water Week
• The Seven Seas Cruising Association
• Seven Seas U
  
• World Cruising Destinations: An Inspirational Guide to All Sailing Destinations at Amazon.com

If you have a question about going cruising that you want answered,
- email it to: kathy@forcruisers.com,
- or join the next Women and Cruising webinar!